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Monday, December 31, 2007

Upcoming South Side Theater Events Courtesy of the Orland Park Theater Troupe, Village of Orland Park

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I got the following information from Fran at the Orland Park Park District who publishes a regular theater newsletter which I have abstracted here. I use the term abstracted lightly here; this is nearly here entire newsletter. Fran, if this use is not O.K. just email me at ThePeterFilesBlog AT Gmail Dot Com and I will pull this post forthwith.

If you find this information useful, I suggest that you subscribe directly to Fran's newsletter by writing to rpintern@orland-park.il.us attention FRAN and asking to subscribe. MANY KUDOS to FRAN for this difficult undertaking.

Here's from her latest newletter:

The Orland Park Theatre Troupe will be finishing out its’ 2006/2007 season with our yearly musical, Grease in April and Break A Leg in June. Our 2007 / 2008 season will begin with Revenge Of The Wiz in October and our Holiday production in December is yet to be determined. Grease, as you all know, will be open to everyone of high school age and up. Break A Leg is open to all, age 12 and up and Revenge Of The Wiz is an adult age production. We’re excited about our season and look forward to another very successful year! Thanks to all who have been involved this year, whether on stage or behind the scenes; your participation is invaluable and what continues to make the OPTT such a success!

On to upcoming shows! Northwest Indiana’s South Shore Brass Band with the Memorial Opera House Carolers performs this weekend in A Very Brassy Christmas Concert! Don’t forget Curtain Call’s Fiddler On The Roof in January. Those tickets continue selling fast but check out their online ticket reservations website below!

Don’t miss auditions for the OPTT’s production of Grease, BTG’s Jesus Christ, Superstar, and Oak Lawn ’s Thoroughly Modern Millie! Read all the details below! Living Hope Lutheran Church and The Leo School of Theatre in Frankfort are still in need of participants for Jesus Christ, Superstar! If interested, please contact them at 815-464-0101 to see what roles may still be open!

Also, the Beverly Arts Center is currently looking to fill six theater related positions. If anyone is interested, go to their website @ www.beverlyartcenter.org to see what’s happening there!

If you would like to submit information regarding theater issues to be included in the Theatre Happenings E-column, please feel free to do so by noon each Tuesday, at: rpintern@orland-park.il.us, Subject: FRANN. Remember, all the information must be included; name of organization, name of show, when it is showing, where it is showing- including the address, the times of the performances and the box office number. If all of the information is not there, I cannot post it.


Here is their list of current auditions and shows.

MEMORIAL OPERA HOUSE
A VERY BRASSY CHRISTMAS – STARRING: NORTHWEST INDIANA’S SOUTH SHORE BRASS BAND & THE MEMORIAL OPERA HOUSE CAROLERS!
WHEN: Friday, December 21st
WHERE: Memorial Opera House @ 104 Indiana Avenue , Valparaiso , Indiana
TIMES: 7:30pm
TICKETS: $10.00 Adults / $8.00 Students & Seniors
BOX OFFICE: 219-548-9137



BEVERLY THEATRE GUILD
JESUS CHRIST SUPERSTAR - AUDITIONS
WHEN: January 3rd, 5th & Callbacks on January 6th if needed.
WHERE: Salem United Church of Christ @ 9717 S. Kostner Ave , Oak Lawn
TIMES: Thursday 7:15 – 9pm / Saturday 1:15-5pm
SHOW DATES: March 14th, 15th & 16th
SHOW LOCATION: Beverly Arts Center @ 2407 W. 111th Street , Chicago
TICKETS: $20.00 Adults / $19.00 Senior (62+) & Students (with current ID) / $18 Military~Retired or Active / $18 Group Sales ~20 or more
BOX OFFICE: 773-445-3838 or www.beverlyartcenter.org



CURTAIN CALL COMMUNITY THEATER
FIDDLER ON THE ROOF
WHEN: January 3rd, 4th, 5th & 6th
WHERE: Lincolnway East High School , 201 Colorado Avenue , Frankfort
TIMES: Thursday, Friday & Saturday @ 7:30pm / Sunday @ 2:00pm
TICKETS: $18.00 Adults / $16.00 Seniors & Students
BOX OFFICE: 708-699-2228 – Tickets available for purchase through their online box office at: www.ccctheatre.com



OAK LAWN COMMUNITY THEATER
THOROUGHLY MODERN MILLIE - AUDITIONS
WHEN: January 6th & 7th with tentative callbacks on the 8th
WHERE: Oakview Recreation Center @ 4625 W. 110th Street , Oak Lawn
TIMES: Sunday, 1/6 @ 1-5pm / Monday, 1/7 @ 7:30-10:00pm
SHOW DATES: March 6th, 7th, 8th, 14th, 15th & 16th
SHOW LOCATION: Oakview Recreation Center @ 4625 W. 110th Street , Oak Lawn
TICKETS: $19.00 Adults / $18.00 Students & Seniors
BOX OFFICE: 708-857-2200



ORLAND PARK THEATRE TROUPE
GREASE! - AUDITIONS
WHEN: January 20th & 21st (22nd – Callbacks if necessary)
WHERE: Old Village Hall @ 14413 Beacon, Orland Park , IL
TIMES: Sunday, the 20th ~ 1 – 6pm / Monday 21st ~ 7 – 10pm /
Tuesday, the 22nd ~ Callbacks if necessary 7:00pm
SHOW DATES: April 25th, 26th & 27th
SHOW LOCATION: Carl Sandburg Performing Arts Center @ 13100 LaGrange Rd.
SHOW TIMES: Friday & Saturday @ 7:00pm / Sunday @ 2:00pm
TICKETS: $17.00 Adults / $15.00 Seniors & Students / $13.00 Children to age 12
BOX OFFICE: 708-403-7275
Must sing 16 measures of a prepared piece of music from the show, be prepared to learn a brief dance and read from script.



ORLAND PARK COMEDY IMPROV
COMEDY IMPROV
WHEN: Friday’s, January 25th, February 22nd & March 28th
WHERE: Old Village Hall @ 14413 Beacon, Orland Park , IL
TIMES: 8:00pm – 10:00pm
TICKETS: $5.00 at the door
BOX OFFICE: 708-403-7275

I hope you found these helpful. Now if I only had information on what the BHUC was up to this spring!

Peter, Chief Editor and Spelling Wrecker
The Peter Files Blog of Comedy, Satire and Commentary
Http://ThePeterFiles.blogspot.com


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Why You Should Never Lie To Your Mother!

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This gutbuster from my friend A.M. is rated P.G. for your Parents Got you!

Brian invited his mother over for dinner. During the
course of the meal, Brian's mother couldn't help but
notice how beautiful Brian's roommate, Jennifer, was.

Brian's Mom had long been suspicious of a relationship
between Brian and Jennifer, and this had only made her
more curious.

Over the course of the evening, while watching the two
interact, she started to wonder if there was more
between Brian and Jennifer than met the eye.

Reading his mom's thoughts, Brian volunteered, "I know
what you must be thinking, but I assure you Jennifer
and I are just roommates."

About a week later, Jennifer came to Brian saying,
"Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been
unable to find the beautiful silver gravy ladle. You
don't suppose she took it, do you?"

Brian said, "Well, I doubt it, but I'll send her an
e-mail just to be sure. So he sat down and wrote:

Dear Mom:
I'm not saying that you "did" take the gravy ladle
from the house, I'm not saying that you "did not" take
the gravy ladle. But the fact remains that one has
been missing ever since you were here for dinner.

Love, Brian

Several days later, Brian received an email back from
his mother that read:

Dear Son:
I'm not saying that you "do" sleep with Jennifer, I'm
not saying that you "do not" sleep with Jennifer. But
the fact remains that if Jennifer is sleeping in her
own bed, she would have found the gravy ladle by now.

Love, Mom

LESSON OF THE DAY - NEVER LIE TO YOUR MOTHER

Busted! If Mom doesn't know, she always has a way of finding out, doesn't she?

Hope you liked this one! If you did, please leave a comment and forward this post to your friends by clicking on the envelope icon below!!!!

Peter, Chief Editor and Spelling Wrecker
The Peter Files Blog of Comedy, Satire and Commentary
Http://ThePeterFiles.blogspot.com


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Sunday, December 30, 2007

Beverly Theater Guild Hosts Jesus Christ Superstar Auditions on January 3rd and 5th, 2008

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Earlier this week I reported on Director Brian Leo's production of Jesus Christ Superstar.

I just received details on the Beverly Theatre Guild's, a respected South Side theatre company that I have been regularly a member of, production of, you guessed it Jesus Christ Superstar!

See the Flyer Below for Details: Auditions are just before Brian Leo's, January 3rd and 5th 2008th.

Performances are at Beverly Art Center 111th Street and Western Avenue in Chicago.

Can't tell you how to decide between the two groups. I do not know the director A.J. Wester or Musical Director Allison Hendrix, but that means nothing since I have been out of the Musical Theatre sceen for awhile. Perhaps knowing them, or geography will help you decide.

I am always bothered when two groups in the same region pick the same show, but sometimes that can't be helped, great minds do think alike. 

I do have a great amount of respect for both BTG and Brian Leo. It should be noted that Brian has worked many times for BTG as a Director and an Actor, and truth in advertising, has cast me in a number of productions.

 So I leave it in your hands. Note that audition dates (His 2nd auditions are on January 7th) allow an actor to audition for both and he has choice parts available too. On the other hand, his rehearsals and performances will be in Frankfort.


Break a leg to all who audition to either one, its a super show! 

If you don't audition for either production please mark the performance dates, which are different, in your engagement calendars. 

I will try to find the Beverly Hills University Clubs' Scholarship Foundation auditions soon too. Will have to dig those up as well.


Note to producers: I saw this notice in my in-box today. I got 50 theater related queries in my blog this week. They could have come to this notice.

Peter, Chief Editor, Theater Watcher and Spelling Wrecker
The Peter Files Blog of Comedy, Satire and Commentary
Http://ThePeterFiles.blogspot.com


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Thursday, December 27, 2007

George Bush Video: You're So Lame (You Probably Thought This Song Was About You)

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And now the video and point in history that many of us have been waiting 7+ years for, the Lame Duck portion of George W. Bush's Presidency, heretofore commemorated by the Obama Girl's video hit You're So Lame (You Probably Think This Song is About You) smash hit parody of the Carly Simon Hit You're So You're So Vane (You Probably Think This Song is About You) (You Probably Think This Song is About You).


A main difference between the two videos, other than the richness of Carly's voice and the higher quality of the original lyrics, is that the original lyrics hide the identity of the target of the song which adds a sense of universality to it, which was only later removed years later when the subject was obstensibly, I believe, to have been revealed as Warren Beatty.

In this version, the politically oriented Obama girls leave no doubt as to whom they believe is the lame duck in the Presidential hot seat, or cold seat, sitting as duck flambe.

But, we have to wonder, to what degree is the song true? Does Bush still have enough influence as benefit to do quite a lot of damage to the nation before leaving office? Is he really lame? Or is this video merely wishful thinking. Surely a Bush endorsement might carry a good deal of weight at a Republican convention, particularly if Daddy Bush was also on Bush was also onboard.

So am I carrying this video to convince you to vote Democrat next fall. Well no, the girls are really cute and the song is funny. Also, they catch a sitting president making an interesting finger movc that I think is unbecoming of a sitting president. Call it "Fingergate" but I don't think a sitting President of the United States should be dong such things in public. It's just a bad example.


Here's the video. Comments welcome. Good and bad. Just no swearing, please. You can be anonymous if you like.





Peter, Chief Editor and Spelling Wrecker
The Peter Files Blog of Comedy, Satire and Commentary
Http://ThePeterFiles.blogspot.com

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Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Seasons Greetings From the Peter Files Blog of Comedy (2007)

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Seasons Greetings!


I hope that you and yours will have or have had

A Merry Christmas

A Happy Hanukkah

A Joyous Eid-Ul-Adha and/or

A Happy New Year!

All the best to you and yours with hopes of peace for the coming year,

Peter, Chief Editor and Spelling Wrecker
The Peter Files Blog of Comedy, Satire and Commentary
Http://ThePeterFiles.blogspot.com


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Friday, December 21, 2007

Teacher Recommendation For Ms. Honeysuckle Sweetpea Vanderbilt

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Teacher Recommendation:

I wholeheartedly recommend Ms. Honeysuckle Sweetpea Vanderbilt for any teaching assignment that she should apply for.

After the months of hell she endured here at our school, I am absolutely convinced that there is no educational situation, including the United States Marine Corps, that Ms. Vanderbilt is not ready to handle.

None of the outright fiascos that occurred in our classroom during her required student teaching stint were her doing, in fact, she averted, spotted, or helped to avert each and every crisis and was especially adept at spotting the life-threatening ones, a valuable asset in a suburban first grade classroom like mine.

First the obvious, Ms. Vanderbilt is a natural teacher. When she opens her mouth, people naturally stop and listen to whatever she has to say. This is because she has the gift of only saying things that are worth saying, and that are relevant or important, such as, "Attention everyone! There is smoke billowing from the boy's bathroom, please line up as if the fire alarm has gone off as it will surely do any second."

Her keen nose got our first-graders to the far stairs just as the fire-alarm was pulled, by Ms. Vanderbilt. This was helpful as our classroom normally exited the building at the near stairs closest to the boy's room. For some God-awful reason the primary department is on the fourth floor of our school and so every second counted that day I can tell you.

Of course it was Kindergartners smoking in the boy's room again and dumping their stubs in the paper towel trash instead of the toilet. Of course, I can't name the family, but every school has one or two of them, we have about 10 of them due to overcrowding. Families I mean. Oddly, only the youngest in two families started smoking without the eldest knowing about it. I believe they have stopped smoking now. Their casts should come off sometime next month.

Ms. Vanderbilt was also very helpful at spotting trouble and danger at our field trip to the ****** County Monster Truck Rally and Gun Show. Personally, I think this kind of event is a little bit much for first graders but until I can get myself onto the Local School Council I don't have much say in which grades get to go to this. At least they keep the Kindergarteners out of the gun show!

Once again we had trouble with a couple of kids who got antsy during the Giant T Jump and Roll Competition, a few of our boys were running around hitting each other with their new (empty) rifles and chased each other onto the track!

Well! I never saw a student teacher move so fast in my life. Ms. Vanderbilt just about leaped out onto that track, leapt out in front of the T-N-T Lizard of Doom Doom Doom before it squashed Toby and Maxie flat, and had them back in their seats before I even knew they were gone.

The boys were upset that their new rifles got squished into the mud, but what can you say? They shouldn't have had them on the track in the first place! Ms. V. also managed to stop a few of the Kindergartners from buying flame-throwers at the gun show. Guess which ones? Don't know how they slipped by their teacher! I'm sure they would have been caught getting off the bus back at school, don't you think?

Ms. V. has also proved to be very good at disarming parents without seeming to touch them. I swear, I saw a parent going after Mr. Nova the science teacher and Ms. V. was standing nearby and that parent just stumbled and fell flat on his face all by his self. No one knows how it happened and we were all looking right at him! The only thing we are all sure of is that Ms. V. didn't move one single muscle.

Ms. V. is a very healthy person, she has encouraged all the kids to exercise and even led a gymnastics club on our field this fall after school. Even some of the teachers joined in. The kids loved it. She brought her boom box and they exercised to songs that were lots of fun. The kids who took part were in a lot better shape and even kept it up after she left. Funny thing, those kids used to get picked on a lot, and they don't at all anymore.

Ms. V. is great in the classroom, knows all the new teaching theories, is great with centers, knows how to evaluate students, do Dibbles testing, and is up on her Fontis and Parnell. The kids love her read-alouds and her lesson plans were letter perfect.

She also had great fashion sense. The kids especially liked it when she wore her purple beret. It was very stylish, very military-like. But don't worry, she is not a forceful or angry person. I have never seen anyone so calm or in control of herself. True to her name, Ms. Honeysuckle Sweetpea Vanderbilt, is as sweet as they come in the classroom and all the kids felt very safe coming to her with their concerns. Sometimes I even wonder how she got through life staying so sweet with a name like that, you'd think she would have been teased to death and compensated for it. But not Ms. V.

If you have any other questions, please feel free to call me at the number above,


Jamie-Lynn Marie Violetta Ashbury-Diamagioletto
First Grade Teacher, The Charleton Heston School of ***** County, ******


I once used to hire and supervise student intern. Part of the job was writing recommendation letters. I did not work in education, but a story a friend of mine told me made me wonder about what a bizarre student-teacher recommendation might look like and the odd twists and turns the story took got very far away from just having to write a letter of recommendation for someone super.

Naturally, the latest news about the younger Ms. Spears deciding to move back to Louisiana crept in at the last minute to influence the mentor teacher's name. Please be assured that this bit was NOT written with the Great State of Louisiana in mind. After all, Texas would be so much more likely, or North Carolina, or Alabama, or maybe even Illinois? LOL

Remember - if you take this stuff seriously you are missing the point! Oh, Good luck to anyone caught up in grown up problems too soon. Whatever they are. From life's difficulties comes character - if you face them head on.

Peter, Chief Editor and Spelling Wrecker
The Peter Files Blog of Comedy, Satire and Commentary
Http://ThePeterFiles.blogspot.com


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Thursday, December 20, 2007

Our Dog of a Hard Drive Ate Your Lesson Plans Honey

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Dear Honey,

Sorry to leave you such bad news taped to the computer so early in the morning, but I thought it best to get out of the house for a little early morning exercise after staying up all night trying to find your missing computer files.

Brace yourself, I think that dog of a hard drive of ours ate your lesson plan folder.

Seriously.

I spent most of last night looking for the files you asked me to, but could not find them. I am hoping that I just misunderstood the file names or the places you keep things, but I don't think so.

Really, it's not my fault. I thought that the drive causing the problems was an old external drive and not our internal drive, and well, I think I was wrong.

If you cannot find copies in your internet email sent folder, perhaps, your Principal Mr. Whizbang, has not deleted his copies? You do email them to him each week, right? He wouldn't just delete them, would he?

Gulp? Hard thing to ask him for though, I know.

Have you kept paper copies? Yes?

In the classroom?

If so we can scan those (I mean, at home) so that you have a record of what happened, and then move on from there. Because your lesson plans have such simple graphics, it may be able to convert them to text WITHOUT corrective typing! Woo Haa!

I tried to find all of the remaining school-related files and build links to them or move them directly to the main Mac Hard Drive. Then I backed them up on your personal folder on the newer "The Truth" drive which I just renamed.

The "bad" drive has been turned off and should not be a problem again. I mean the old drive. If the Data was eaten by the internal drive we have real problems, but I am now backing up things regularly to "The Truth". Bet you will be glad to know that "The Truth" is out there now. Protecting us, I mean.

If the internal drive on our Mac dies completely, well, getting an internal drive replaced on an 800Mhz G4 iMac, well, we might as well upgrade to one of the new 3 Ghz iMacs for the money we'd spend. But I think we could do it, technically. Let's cross that dual-core when we come to it.

At any rate, so you that you could find files and things more easily, I moved copies of those early lesson plan files for reading and social studies to the hard drive. I could not find any for math and science! But the later ones you wanted were gone. I also built links to the files you have put on all our external drives on the main Mac drive so that you did not have to hunt for them anymore. Your links are all colored red now too so that you can find them easily.

Please don't delete anything without checking with me. Since I started making these links for you files you put on external drives may not really be a copy.....

While searching for your student teacher's book order, I did find a cd on which I had burned all the 2006 files at one point, so perhaps I made a backup earlier in 2007 too, I hope so, I will look for that tomorrow. I remember wanting to last month, I just don't know if I got to it. I slipped and fell down the back stairs just around then so I might have forgotten too.

Oh, on the other topic, I did not find your student teacher's book order in the stack that is now on the floor or the computer table, or the two bins of computer-related output, so don't look there.

I love you!

Peter

(P.S. one of the searches I set up was inside all of the text documents for the the name of your school and that did not pull up any later lesson plans. So I think that is really it. There is a small chance that getting file recovery software might work, but with only a gig left on our main drive the chances that the free space isn't overwritten and trashed regularly is pretty remote.)


They say truth is stranger than fiction. Is "The Truth" really out there, or is this fiction? Only "Peter" and his Teacher Honey know in ... The Peter Files.....

Peter, Chief Editor and Spelling Wrecker
The Peter Files Blog of Comedy, Satire and Commentary
Http://ThePeterFiles.blogspot.com


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Five-Year Old Disables Peter Files Blog for Three Weeks

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He's getting nuttin' for Christmas
Mommy and Daddy are mad
He's getting nuttin for Christmas...


No, not true, but disabling the family computer for two weeks goes on "The List".

"The List" you ask?

"The List".

The one that comes out for dates he cares about when he's seriously dating and finally, finally it is time to get even for stunts like this one. I won't go into the gory details, but it was definitely the 5-year old who caused the outage of posts the last few weeks, though sliding down the front stairs on my back in the slush did not help either.

Unfortunately, I can't quote myself in either case this being a family blog, nor could I really punish him for the first incident and the latter was definitely my fault, socks are not slush approved foot attire, even invisible slush.

That's the last time I chase a news carrier to try to mete out a holiday tip though! Last year I got tip notes from 3 different carriers and swore to give only to the right one by giving early. I saw him, opened the door in my socks, hit the porch and kept going! Ouch! No fun! My back was not meant to be a toboggan! Nor was my head. It was in bad enough shape already.

As for the critter whop disabled the blog, I did not even figure out he was the cause of the problem until I figured out the problem two weeks late. Pluggo, Pluggere, Pullee, Outem!

I know, how could I have missed a pulled out plug you say? Because he had pulled it out only so far - and so sometimes it worked long enough for the startup sequence to begin and start vibrating the drives which would then wiggle it loose again.

Oh, it was a frustrating situation.

I only figured it out when I disconnected everything on my way to the computer store and was about to put it in the box and wondered, was that power cable loose? Should I try that fix where you plug in only your Mac with no external peripherals and see if that works better.

Oh. Oh. Started right up the first time. The problem was not with the monitor. Oh. Memory of small boy near power cords. Oh. Oh. Oh.

The lowest form of comedy indeed.

Fortunately I rent him by the week! I need inspiration for my kid jokes you know. Can you imagine if I was actually a parent?

Peter, Chief Editor and Spelling Wrecker
The Peter Files Blog of Comedy, Satire and Commentary
Http://ThePeterFiles.blogspot.com




Addendum: Sadly, I was unable to edit the blog from external locations as I was recovering from some disability related medical procedures. We don't have a back up, if you would like to help improve our blog technology there are two ways, a direct donation through the box above, an indirect donation by buying things from Amazon after starting from this blog, or by visiting our advertisers in logarithmically diminishing value. Thanks for even thinking of it for a nanosecond!

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