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Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Thinking About The Troops


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I give the President a hard time in satire here in these files. But as July 4th comes near I think more and more of our Armed forces themselves who are tirelessly exposing themselves to risk for the cause of freedom and justice.

While this is mainly a blog of comedy and satire, there is nothing funny about the very real sacrifices that our armed service personel are making all over the world in an attemp to make the world a safer and better place and I salute them and want to say how much I appreciate them and what they are doing.

Each and every one of them is somebody's child. Many of them have left children at home, some they have never seen in person. I have only one wish for them. That they are able to come home soon safe and sound and be reunited with their families, their sacrifices having really been worth while.

After Vietnam, many servicement and women were scorned on their return, for so many reasons this will not be the case this time. Even still, as a young boy during those years, I was not one of those who scorned them and could not understand why anyone would heap derision on anyone who would go into battle and risk their lives in service of our country.

It seems now, today, when so many are divided whether our current President made the right call and Iraq is the right, exact place in the Middle East for these troops to be, that the sacrifices of these people are even more noble, following the orders of thier Commander-in-Chief with pride and loyalty in the service of their country, just as they swore and have been trained to do.

Whatever I may think of President Bush's Foreign or Domestic Policy, let there be no mistake about the regard in which I hold our service men and women whether they are Army, Navy, Air Force, Marines, or any special unit, whether regular service or in via National Guard or some other way, it is very great.

I hope you all do well and will be safe and continue to do your best to uphold the standards and beliefs of this proud nation. WIll keep an eye out for trouble, protect your buddies, and others as you can, and remember if you read this that my voice is one of millions that are quietly praying for you to come home in one piece, body and soul, physically and mentally sound.

All the best,

Happy 4th!

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Sunday, June 26, 2005

The George Bush Countdown Clock


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Here's a page you'll surely want to bookmark.

Yes from the folks at BBSpot.com it's the George W. Bush Countdown Clock, giving the estimated Hours, Minutes and seconds until the end of George W. Bush's second term in office when the nation can breathe easier, except, presumably, the nation's comedians who plan to schedule a National Day of Comedic Mourning.

The Last Comedian's National Day of Mourning was when Dan Quayle ended his term as Vice-president of the United States when the considerably less funny President George Herbert Walker Bush left office. Had the nation's comedians known what immense humor was going to come their way soon from Bill and Hillary Clinton the last National Day of Comedic Mourning might have been a Comedic Mardi Gras instead.

And in fact, this next day of mourning is only tentatively scheduled. If the finalists for President are, as some speculate, Jeb Bush and Hillary Clinton, it is unlikely that comedic funereal colors will be hauled out for this occasion.

While of course, it is possible, that the next President, might bring on the kind of comedy inspired by the Clinton and Bush families, it is hard to imagine a Presidential Family currently eligible to hold office AND likely to win in 2008 that will provide the kind of material we've been seeing for what will have been the last 16 years.

Of course the Bush years were tempered by the threat of terrorism and the Saddam/Ossama spelling error, but W's spectacular talent for humorisity has made a remarkable impact on his term in office that is likely to make a series of books and films to make Harry Potter look like, well, child's play.

So here it is, for better for worse. My sidebar is getting crowded, but I will leave a link to this in my sidebar, and you can of course follow the link to the original by going to the host, www.bbspot.com, a host of many humorus features.

Till next time,



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The Peter Files All Purpose Promotional Video


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Because of a stunning technological breakthrough, The Peter Files Blog of comedy and Satire has now been granted access to the world's first all-purpose promotional video. A media production that places the historical importance of The Peter Files Blog of Comedy and Satire in its proper historical perspective for perhaps the first time ever.

While the film is not quite out of post-production, in fact, our in-house editors have just gotten their hands on it, our top communications officers Winkin, Blinkin and Nod, felt that we should rush out this test preview for some initial reactions before we go to the cost of completely customizing this film to our own firm needs.

Because of this we are providing a cheat sheet of sorts.

1) Every time the film refers to "Your Name Here" Just think "The Peter Files Blog"

2) Every time the film refers to "Your Product Here" Just think "A blog of comedy and satire".

Since these two key phrases are repeated endlessly in the film, you may want to print this entry before clicking on our film review link.

3) Don't worry, we noticed the one bad habit that the tobacco industry managed to sneak in, it's already on the list to be cut out. If you see other problems with the film, please let us know.

4) You will be presented, as we are, with some other optional choices, please think about these and tell us which ones you prefer, in this way you can impact what everyone else will see when the film is finished and all the special effects are added in.

You may be surprised to know that Star Wars III, I am told, looked a great deal like this film before the special effcts were added in, so the final cut will look a lot better, with your help!

5) Once you have seen this exciting new film, If you have any comments about this brand new effort, please feel free to share them in the comments area below.

Click here to see the Movie!

Thanks for coming by!

See you soon!

Peter, the Peter Files Blog of Comedy and Satire

Note: For some reason, a giant blank space has taken up residence between the end
of this post and the comments link.

Try as I might I have not been able to get rid of
it. Perhaps it is a green blancmange waiting to take over the page.

Perhaps I tweeked the wrong css code.

Pehaps I don't really know what I'm doing here and making any kind of changes in my
template code, which I've been doing everyday for weeks now is just asking for trouble.

Yeah, that's probably it. Anyway, hit Page Down about 6 times and you should see it.

Sorry for the technical difficulties.



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Thursday, June 23, 2005

Introducing - Dear Dr. Pete


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The Peter Files Introduces Our New Column:
Dear Dr. Pete

After several months of searching for a low-cost high quality advice columnist for The Peter Files, the crockpot staff (they were hungry) of The Peter Files gave up and have at long last identified and settled for an advice columnist that will be sure to entertain you with his excellent and soul searching advice, his clever barbs, and his complete lack of medical training. We welcome Dr. Pete the internationally rebutted psychobabbelist from the bowels of the Frankenbabble Institute, in Liebkioven Germany. What Dr. Pete lacks in substance, we are sure you will agree, he more than makes up for in volume! Velcome, er, Welcome Dr. Pete!

Dear Dr. Pete,

If this is your first column, how can you have letters already? Did you make them up?


Dear Skeptical,

Vat a cynic you are! Did you zink zat und international celebrity zuch as myzelf sprang out ov novhere overnight? Just zee letters from my relatives alone! Zo I vould never zink zo low as to include vone of zem unless I vas truly desperate vor some gut content. I zink zat zis skepticizm means zat you hav ze issues vit your mother about zee zeparation angst as und child vich you need to reszolve by tellingink her vat a nogoodnick you are. If she iz not around your wife or girlvriend vil do.

Dr. Pete

Dear Dr. Pete,

I find my self repeatedly saying the words "Beachball" and "Bingo" together when I have no idea what to say during lulls in telephone conversations, can you beachball tell me what to do? This problem is driving my wife bingo nuts!

The Alliterator


Mr. Allitrator, I zee zat you are havink zee clazzick zigns of vanting to get out of ze office und play hookie, vich is a very gud idea vor a perzon zuch az yourzelf who iz clearly zo riddled vit anxziety zat he iz dezperate enough to write un imaginary doctor zuch az myzelf ven clearly zis iz madness.

Unvortunately, zee Bingo part ov your habit betrayz a dezire to go back into ze pazt and be in und old Frankie Avalon und Annette Funnicello beach movie, ziss is a zign of a need for zever regression and perhaps a dezire to have your mozzer take care ov you again.

In udder words, you are a zikko. I zuggest zat you zee a real doctor immediately, or get a blanket and a copy of "Beach Blanket Bingo" und take zome time off.


Dr. Pete

(Editor's note: These two letters are a bad sign. Did we make a mistake? Dr. Pete may be nuts. But he is very cheap. Hmmn. Well, whatever you do out there, please, please do not take his advice. Not that "Mr. Alliterator" appears to be all that stable either. On to the next letter.)

Dear Dr. Pete,

Are panic attacks normal? I seem to have trouble answering the phone whenever I can see that my mother is calling on my call waiting. When her number flashes I immediately find that my heart rate rises, I find it hard to breathe, walking to the phone is like walking through a column of thick water, and all I want to do is run outside as quickly as possible. By the time I reach the phone I am quaking with anxiety, trembling and fear. Yet if I don't answer the phone I am wracked with the most terrible guilt, I feel dizzy, and find trouble breathing and often cannot make it out of the house to get some fresh air. Is this normal? Or am I a looney?

Panic Man

Dear Panic Man,

I um very glad to put your mind at eaze. Vat you are veeling eeze pervactly normal and is velt by millions ov people every day. Ve are in vact blezzed today vit call vating technology zat allowzs uz to skip zeese calls zat vould oderwize caouze uz no end of zenzless grief.

Zee guilt you veel is zee hangover of both zee Judeo and zee Christian roots ov our Zivilization and can be freely abandonded if zay are not too deeply ingrained in your noodle. Unfortunatly, myzelf included, guilt iz often zee unavoidable conzequenze of having ze moder. Ah pooh! Vat can you do?

Ven I skip ze callz, depending on how guilty I veel, I zend a nice jar of pickles or a box of chocolates. Perhaps zat will work vor you. Zer iz no known cure vor zis zituation I am zorry to zay. At least zank God it is not your Girlfreund!

Vat a nightmare zat would be! HO HO HO HO HO! Zat iz Funny!

Dr. Pete

P.S. Ov course you are a Looney, but zen zo is most of Congrezz zo you do not have to worry zat zomeone vill notice, zee time to worry iz when you ztart to have ze zymtoms ov being vell all zee time, zat is vhen zey lock you up!

Dear Dr. Pete,

I made a tinkle!


Dear Jeffery,

Tell my Cousin April zat zese pathetic attempts to get you into my column vill no longer work, er, Verk.

Your Cousin,

Dr. Pete

P.S. Jeffery, I am proud of you. Enclosed is a dollar, next time you moder makes you write me, do a tinkle in her underwear drawer and I vill zend you anoder dollar.

Dear Cousin Dr. Pete,

Is it O.K. if it was a number two? Mom was really mad!

Your Sore Little Cousin Jeffrey

Dear Sore Little Cousin Jeffery,

Zorry for your pain. Your zeal to please me resulted in more punishment than even I expected. Zee DCFS will zoon explain this with your moder.

In the mean time I have not had ziss gud a laugh in zo long I cannot remember. Zank you. Here is twenty dollars for zee extra dooty pain.

Cousin Dr. Pete

Deer Dr. Pete,

All I can think of is Deer.

Deer, reindeer, stuffed deer, venison, deer heads, plastic deer, inflatable deer, deerly beloved, and now, Deer Dr. Pete.

Is this Normal?

Near Deer

Dear Near Deer,

No dees obzezzion vis zee deer you half eez not normal. I hav conzulted vit my deer eggspurt Ralph Neighdeer und he sayz dat you is crazier zan un hooter owl. Zince he is environmentally conziouz I zink he zould know a kook when he zeez one. He zertainly knows zee Hooterz girlz.

I zink zat at minimum you zhould tak a brake frum all zeez deer bizness and try zumzing elze. Perhops a leeltle hossenpheffer or zome rabbit stew? Zat haz zome of zee wild taste of zee venizon vitout zee high ztorrage cost.

In zee mean time, don't deerspare. Try to haf zome neer beer und dat should make it a bitter better, ya?

Dr. Pete

And that's about all the column space we had today for our new feature Dear Dr. Pete.
(What a nightmare - I can see the letters pouring in now)

Please write in and tell us what you think of our new columnist. We have had a staff meeting and due to the content of today's column this may be his last. Please advise us on whether to keep our staff advice columnist or leave your own questions for Dear Dr. Pete
(Why did I have to say that? The publisher made me, that's why!)

The small print regarding our new column, Dear Dr. Pete.

1) Dr. Pete is not a Doctor nor has he played one on the stage.

2) Dr. Pete is only a Doctor in the same way that The Bundy Family on
Married with Children might be considered an actual, normal, real American Family.

3) That is to say, Dr. Pete
is not in any way a real bona-fide Medical Doctor, has no Medical Degree from any University of any kind, nor is licensed to practice Medicine in any state. In fact, Dr. Pete is not so much a Doctor as he is a flunked out blog repair technican candidate who attempted to "Doctor" his grades so as to graduate.

4) This means that the opinions of Dr. Pete carry the same medical weight as a comic strip character and a mentally challenged one at that.

5) Anyone who considers following the advice of Dr. Pete is hereby notified that they are following the advice of a block of cheese in the back of our staff refrigerator that has gotten a bit mouldy and therefore cannot be sued.

6) For security reasons, number six is locked up in a Swiss Vault under the highest possible security, suffice it to say, if you could read number six, it would say, don't believe a doggone thing Dr. Pete says.

7) Following the advice of the alleged Dr. Pete carries the same risk as a surfing on lava or flying a kite during the worst thunderstorm of the year - don't do it.

Now that the mumbo jumbo that our summer intern Pixie slipped past the proofreaders has been dealt with, here are our first letters to Dr. Pete.

Zimilarities in name between columnists of the Peter files, such as Dr. Pete, and Peter of the Peter Files, are of course, entirely coincidental. No laundry was soiled during the creation of this post. Resemblences between the name Jeffery and large Trademark animals are ridiculous, punnatious, and
specious and I will have none of that kind of talk. Especially since it makes some of the images in the above piece really very nasty and this site is supposed to be safe for work and home.

The possibility that Dr. Pete is from the Animal Kingdon himself and is the result of endless typing by an infinate number of simians, is of course, very unlikely. Bribing small or even medium age children to do naughty things to other adults is very wrong and we have spoken very harshly to Dr. Pete and he promises never to do it again unless it serves a legitmate theraputic purpose, which he insists it did in this case, but then hemmed and hawed when pressed about what it might be.

No emus, blah, blah, see the footnote.

That's it for this file,



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Monday, June 20, 2005

Art de Triumph


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Did you hear about the guy in Paris who almost got away with stealing
several paintings from the Louvre?

After planning the crime, getting in and out past security,
he was captured only two blocks away when his SUV ran out of gas.

When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such
an obvious error, he replied: "Monsieur, I had no Monet to buy Degas
to make the Van Gogh."

And you thought I lacked De Gaulle to tell you a story like this!

Just goes to show you that in the art world crime doesn't pay, but art de triumph!

Pierre de le Pew

Thanks to CM for this abstraction of humorte de art.
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May you have the hindsight to know where you've been

And the foresight to know where you're going

And the insight to know when you're going too far.


(Not to be confused with the saint, though I try, much the good that is does me.)


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Friday, June 17, 2005

Beverly Theatre Guild Auditions For "Broadway On The Corner" Fundraiser For Beverly Arts Center


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Beverly Theatre Guild Auditions For Broadway On The Corner Fundraiser For Beverly Arts Center
Originally uploaded by ThePeterFiles.

My friends at BTG are doing a fundraiser to help buy a Marquee for the new
Beverly Arts Center. If you are theatrically inclined, come on out for the

Beverly Theatre Guild
Audition Notice

Broadway on the Corner
Fund Raiser for a Marquee at the Beverly Arts Center

Director: Fred Eberle
Musical Director: Peg Mooney
Choreographer: Barbara Moore

A Musical Revue

Comprised of solos, duets, and ensemble numbers.
Some of the songs in the revue include:

ANY DREAM WILL DO (Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat)
CABARET (Cabaret)
COMEDY TONIGHT (A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Forum)
I AM WHAT I AM (La Cage Aux Follies)
I BELIEVE IN YOU (How to Succeed in Business)
IF WE ONLY HAVE LOVE (Jacques Brel Is Alive & Well and Living in Paris)
LOOK TO THE RAINBOW (Finian's Rainbow)
KIDS (Bye, Bye Birdie)
MAN OF LA MANCHA I, Don Quixote (Man Of La Mancha)
MUSIC OF THE NIGHT (Phantom Of The Opera)
PUTTING IT TOGETHER (Sunday In the Park with George)
THE RHYTHM OF LIFE (Sweet Charity)
TONIGHT (West Side Story)
TOO DARN HOT (Kiss Me Kate)

Audition Dates & Times, Open Auditions - No appointment is necessary:

Monday, June 20, 2005; registration from 7:00 pm to 8:30 pm.
Tuesday, June 21, 2005; registration from 7:00 pm to 8:30 pm.

Auditions Held At: Beverly Arts Center, 2407 W. 111th St., Chicago

At the Auditions:
1. Be prepared to perform one verse from a song that you feel shows your
vocal range. {Please bring the sheet music for a piano accompanist; or,
pre-recorded music with a playback device.} You may also be asked to learn a
song and sing it.
2. Be prepared for a movement audition.
3. If you have other performing arts talent, {such as dancing - ballet, tap,
jazz; and/or mime, acrobatics, etc}, please also audition those talents.

Cast Descriptions:
1. Men and Women: All ages and all vocal ranges.
2. Children: Beginning at the age of 7. Need to be comfortable performing;
and, available during tech week until 11 pm.

For the most part, Monday, Tuesday and/or Thursday evenings beginning at 7 p.m.;
and, Sunday beginning at 12:30 p.m.

Production Dates:
Friday, August 19, 2005 at 8:00 pm
Saturday, August 20, 2005 at 8:00 pm
Sunday, August 21, 2005 at 2:00 pm

For More Information:
Please call the BTG Voice Mail (312-409-2705) and leave a message.
We will return your call as soon as possible.

The Beverly Theatre Guild (BTG) is a not-for-profit community theatre company
that has been a part of our community since 1929. Although we do have a few
positions that pay a stipend, most of our production staff and all actors are
volunteers. We hope that you will consider auditioning for BTG. We encourage
actors who have been on our stage and actors who have never worked with us to
join us in bringing the experience of live theatre to the southwest side.

If you can't make the auditions, put the production dates in your calendar for
a great show!


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The Greatful Dead, Live at Three Rivers Stadium, June 30, 1995


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Hear the Greatful Dead, June 30th, 1995 concert at Three Rivers Stadium in Pittsburg, PA.

High-Fi Feed

Low-Fi Feed

Unlike most Rock Bands the Greatful Dead encouraged their fans to record their concerts and distribute them.

This is one of many attitudes that created incredible loyalty among the Greatful Dead's fans.

Gotta Take Me To The Promised Land....

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Thursday, June 16, 2005

The Peter Files Summer Film Festival: Superman: The Mechanical Monsters


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This summer The Peter Files will feature some short films from the archives of out of copyright films from various sources.

They will vary in length and type, some will be cartoons, and some will be short and educational films of one kind or another.

In some cases, such as today's film, the characters such as Superman, are clearly trademark characters, but for some reason the owners of the films such as in this case, Paramount Pictures and Action Comics allowed the copyright on this cartoon, Superman: The Mechanical Monsters go into the public domain. Their loss is our gain and so I bring you the links to view it yourselves in either QuickTime or Real Player format.

In Superman: The Mechanical Monsters, a mad scientist unleashes giant flying robots to rob banks and loot museums. Naturally it does not take long for the Daily Planet to assign ace reporter Clark Kent to the story or for scoop hungry Lois Lane to figure out a way to nose into the story.

When Lois Lane gets into trouble in pursuit of one of the giant robots after a $50,000,000 jewel heist, Superman goes into action and saves the day. This is the early Action Comics Superman. He is not quite so invulnerable as the Superman of the 70's and after and so his efforts to fight the robots and save Lois are a bit tougher and somehow more heroic perhaps than the all powerful Supes of the comics of today.

There is something a little more appealing about this 1941 Superman, fighting for truth, justice and the American way. A Superman who is, but is only "Faster than a speeding bullet, more powerful than a locomotive, able to leap tall buildings in a single bound..." Yes, this Superman leaps more than flies, leaping up in a great bound then gliding as much a flying down, yes he flies, but not with the magic of today's Superman. When he fights the Massive robots he takes his hits and we are not certain he will survive all immidiate threats. Superman as it was, and perhaps as it always should have been.

That's why I picked this public domain clip to start my series. It's about 9 minutes long but packed with fun. Super-time anyone?

Animation by Steve Muffati and George Germanetti. Music by Sammy Timberg. Produced in 1941.

Director: Dave Fleischer
Production Company: Paramount Pictures, Action Comics & Superman Magazine
Audio/Visual: sound, color

For dial-up QuickTime Click Here
For Broad-Band QuickTime Click Here

Get your popcorn and soda ready, and enjoy the show!


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North Central College to Present "The Music Man" August 4, 5, 6 and 11, 12, 13


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My friend Jim tells me that he has been cast in this production of The Music Man, one of my favorite musicals because it was the first that I was in that was done with near professional onstage and backstage elements. While I had been in children’s productions before, my first exposure to adult community theatre was in sixth grade, when the Beverly Hills University Club Scholarship Foundation presented The Music Man with all the bells and whistles. Never had I seen 10 - 15 people whose job it was solely to do make-up, another 12 to move sets and set pieces on and off stage, a full orchestra, and a Harold Hill and Marian Paroo to set the imagination on fire.

The music from the show is wonderful. Trouble, to my mind, is the first public rap song. It could be sung, but in large part it is not, because it is a salesman’s pitch, a patter, a spellbinding rhythm. And lest you think all the other music dated, The Beatles made Till There Was You a hit record once again, well after the musical had faded from pop memory.

So I am looking forward to this production with some anticipation. Songs like The Wells Fargo Wagon and Seventy-Six Trombones are incredible with a large chorus and this one is likely to be one of the largest choruses you will see for a long time to come.

As part of its Summer Musical Production Program for the Community and Other Visitors North Central College is presenting Meredith Wilson’s The Music Man, directed and choreographed by Brian Lynch with an amazing cast of 154 this is one of the largest River City productions you are likely to see in a theatre! Steve Peebles plays silver tongued Harold Hill who has come to Iowa Stubborn River City to because of the Trouble that has come to River city in the form of a - well that would be telling, now wouldn’t it?

Suffice it to say, that Hill’s powers of persuasion arouse the suspicion of Mayor Shinn, (played by Ben Murray) and the Town Council, who Mayor Shinn sends to get Hill’s credentials, but they are no match for Hill, seller of Boy’s Bands AND Uniforms (of course - the natural aide for the trouble that besets the town) for Hill immediately spots their musical talent and turns them into a Barber Shop Quartet who need only a little Sincere diverting to remember Lida Rose, for them to say Good Night Ladies while Hill sneaks out the back. The Ladies take a shine to Hill but they tend to Pick-a-Little, Talk-a-Little when it comes to others in town who give Piano Lessons.

Hill has other chickens to fry, however, and if you are going to sell instruments and uniforms for a boy’s band and you don’t have a lick of musical training then you have one natural enemy, the town’s music teacher, in this case one Marian Paroo (played by Colette Belanger). Now normally, the local talent is no challenge for a confidence man of Hill’s caliber, but Marian Paroo is no wide eyed innocent gal, no sir! But Hill thinks he is just the ticket for his philosophy has always been The Sadder But Wiser Girl for Me, but be careful what you wish for Mr. Hill.

Fortunately for the plot, Marian the Librarian, despite her steelie eyed expressions, has not given up on singing Good Night My Someone or searching for My White Knight, and, Being in Love is something Marian still longs to do, though the likes of Harold Hill are not her idea of a dragon slayer.

Hill sells the whole town on the idea of a boys band with its Seventy-Six Trombones which then come in on the Wells Fargo Wagon, from perhaps as far as Gary, Indiana?

First Marian and then Harold(?) start to see that It’s You until the Shipoopi hits the fan, and Will I Ever Tell You, is there ever a stir in River City until this amazing American musical comes to its climactic end.

Fans of the musical will know that I’ve taken a few liberties with the order of the songs and the story so as not to reveal too much and to have a little fun with those who know it all by heart. If you haven’t seen this show, you really ought to, and bring the kids, even with what has to be double casting of some of the chorus (though it is a very large theater) this show has some of the most enjoyable and singable songs and melodies from the American Theatre, made even better when sung by a large number of people.

It should also be noted that with a cast this large, tickets won’t last long.

Performance dates: August 4, 5, 6, 11, 12, 13 8 p.m.

North Central College | 30 North Brainard Street, Naperville, IL 60540 | 800-411-1861

Here’s the cast:

Traveling Salesmen:
Sean Roe, Jim Mulqueeny, Garret Lutz, Roger Hendrickson, Jon Ripsky
Mike Frain, Connor O'Leary, Bryson Hoff, and Ricky Lurie

Charlie Cowell Matt Wolski

Conductor George Pradel

Harold Hill Steve Peebles
Mayor Shinn Ben Murray

The Quartet:
Ewart Dunlop Chris Oeschel
Oliver Hix Dave Kokandy
Jacey Squires Mike Sillar
Olin Britt Adam Billman-Galuhn

Marcellus Washburn Dennis Brown
Tommy Djilas Paul Ripsky

Marian Paroo Colette Belanger
Mrs. Paroo Amber Mitchell

Amaryllis Megan C. and Grace E.
Winthrop Paroo Liam B. and Matt Z.

Eulalie MacKecknie Shinn Leslie Lee
Zaneeta Shinn Kelsy Lehn
Gracie Shinn Molly Durava

Pick-a-Little Ladies:
Alma Hix Marilyn DiCola
Maud Dunlop Jill Morrow
Ethel Toffelmier Shelly Crawford
Mrs. Squires Lynn Hoff

Judy Colonero, Cathy Geers, Kristin Kriegbaum
Jeanne Ripsky, Jane Russom, Ellen Stone and
Hillary Jones

Constable Locke Jon Ripsky


Megan C., Paul C. , Brooke C., Connor F. , Natalie G., Rose G.,
Isabelle H,. Olivia L., Melissa K., Betsy M., Emily R., Katie S.,
Amy S., Amanda S., Kristen S., Madison W., and Christine W.

Shelby Bier, Mike Frain, Bryson Hoff, Carrington Konow, Allison Kiolbasa, Garrett Lutz,
Ha Price, Bailey Mitchell, Meghan Mitchell, David Mussleman, Kathy Mussleman,
Sean Roe, Kaitlin Scully, Sydney Sherman , Jaclyn Sirotek , Tyler Sonkin, Leslie Smith,
Elizabeth Frain, Connor O'Leary John Radford and Avery Sipla

Allyssa Allgood, Martin Amesquita, Kathryn Baur, Anna Bax, Alex Benoit,
Jeanne Bonamer, Madeline Brady, Ashlee Brooks, Laura Bueche, Maria Caballero,
Ryan Cap, Judy Colonero Kara Combs Emily Crowe Kristen Eichamer
Grace Etzkorn, Jennifer Foster, Connor Frain, Elizabeth Frain, Michael Frain,
Amanda Garvey, Jennifer Glasse, Corrie Graham, Lauren Grobersk,i Elaine Grief,
Roger Hendrickson, Samantha Hoffman, Savanna Hoffman, Tim Herberger, Allison Hitchcock,,
Maggie Johnson, Erika Kissel, Antoinette Konow, Kristin Kriegbaum, Jaynee Krippel,
Nora Laidman, Richard Laidman, Danica Lantz, Karen Lantz, Kelsey Lehn,
Jane Liddy, Sean Lynch, Colleen Morris, Katie McKay, Michelle MacFarlane,
Julia Michelson, Nikki Miller, Alexandria Moorman, Claire Morley,
Colleen Morris, David Musselman, Victoria Newhuis, Chloe O’Dekirk, Alexandria Oechsel,
Erin Oechsel, Connor O'Leary, Sydney O’Leary, Katie Paulson, Erin Planek ,
Michelle Poulsen , John Radford, Jeanne Ripsky, Sean Roe, Kristen Rohder,
Kira Rysiewicz, Gina Santucci, Sydney Sherman, Kavya Shetty, Avery Sipla,
Pamela Smith, Rebecca Soloman, Elizabeth Steffeter, Courtney Stump, Jason TerMaat,
Courtney Uberas, Mary Venderley, Tiffany Vierra, Lauren Visher, and Victoria Visher

(Apologies in advance for errors or omissions. Data taken from cast web site. Typographical errors may have been introduced in the compositing process. Cast data taken from data published on North Central College website, any whose names are presented here may request quick removal by clicking on words "Smart off" at the end of the the post, in most cases I should be able to update the web page and remove the comments)

For those who have seen the show, or want to go in with a little of the lingo of the times:

Ever have trouble telling your piggins, from your noggins, and your firkins?

Ever wonder what all the fuss was about Chaucer, Rabelais, and Balzac?

Did’ja ever have trouble telling your steelies, from your aggies, your PeeWees or your Glassies?

Then you need someone who can rebuckle your research below the knee! Click and enjoy!

Click here for a Biography and Photo of Meredith Wilson and his Second Wife Rini.

That’s it for this file!

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Mac Journal Test


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I am testing out a new Blogging tool called MacJournal. It will take a couple of days to see whether it really helps or not.

This is really just a test entry.

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Monday, June 13, 2005

Jackson Found Not Guilty On All Counts - But His Trials Are Not All Over


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I hardly know what to say about this story.

What I wanted was for Michael Jackson to be innocent, and now the jury has found him so.

As a fan of his music for many years, since I was a child in fact, I admired his music and his talent. I wished that my family was like the Jacksons and that I could be like Michael, the lead singer in a family band. Or the Osmonds, or the Partridge family. I admit it, I was fickle.

And now, when I think I know some of what it took to be one of the Jackson 5 - and of course, I don't know a fraction of the real story, who can really know anything of what its really like to be another person, I'm pretty glad I did not grow up with those challenges and pressures.

Yet when I think back to the early Michael Jackson what I remember is a bright, happy shining star. Innocent, happy, fun, yet precise and amazingly professional, able to do things that I at the same age could not even dream of doing in terms of eye hand coordination and dance.

So how did that young man become the Michael Jackson we know today?

Certainly from the media reports he has issues with the loss of his childhood to that professional life. That is certainly understandable. And there is lots of stress in growing up in the eye of the media. Still, how could he have turned into someone capable of terrible acts, or, of not understanding how his behavior would be perceived?

The question one has to ask in asking "Was he doing it: if not here, then elsewhere?" - is could Michael Jackson have been so traumatized as a youth and so protected by his handlers, and so needy an individual that he actually could not understand how his activities, if innocent, would be perceived?"

The "How could he be THAT naive?" question.

Yet the truth is, no one has ever claimed that Michael Jackson was a rocket scientist in any area other than music, lyrics and dance. If we presume for a moment that in fact he is a savant, a genius in these limited areas, then he could be limited in other areas. There are precedents.

A famous mathematician who is brilliant but depends on others to make sure he has a place to live, something to eat and clothes to wear.

A brilliant pianist who fights schizophrenia, yet is masterful when he inhabits something resembling reality.

Could childhood abuse or conditions have caused a splintering of Jackson's personality such that he is as innocent in his behavior as he claims, that he truly does find the allegations sickening and disheartening as he says, and cannot imagine that anyone would believe these things of him who was known so well for so long, and has done so much for children?

I think it is possible. But I also think that this legal episode should have taught him something about human nature to make clear that the world does not suffer that kind of innocence lightly. That he was lucky to get off, lucky to be accused by those of questionable - according to the defense - reliability. That he should not have anymore overnight guests and he might do well to have 24 hour camera surveillance in his home from now on, sad as it may be, just to protect himself from future claims.

Now isn't that a sorry thing to have to say in an innocent until proven guilty country to a man who has just gotten a not guilty verdict. But if you accept the jury's verdict, and you have been a fan of his music, then you really don't ever want to watch this happening again.

But did he do it? Did he go so far as to actually molest children after getting them drunk?

Yuck. I'd have to say, no, I don't think so. For certain I believe that he believes he did nothing wrong.

What I think he was doing was regressing back to age 5 or 6 and having pajama parties and possibly doing this literally, losing track of the fact that he was an adult in the process. Not a crime. Not abusive.

But not good for a child to be exposed to and certainly not good for Jackson himself IF and this is a big if, this is what happened, but there is a lot of evidence from MJ's own words that this is what was going on. I just don't think that anyone of his age was going to say, "I would forget that I was a grown-up and play like I was 5 again and having kids around me overnight helped me do that, create a new reality I could escape to when the pressures of my reality became too tough."

And look at who he invited, sick kids, kids with cancer who had bad realities they wanted to escape too. The ones most likely to want to play let's pretend. The ones least likely to be scared by lets pretend too because who else would want to escape the realities of their own situation, and in that sense, the MJ escape-o-Rama might even have had some benefits.

Hard to say.

He should have had cameras to protect himself but that would have been to real and possibly to embarrassing if he was truly going to regress. Would you want a disgruntled servant servant showing you prancing around in your jammies like a five year old? Thought not. But that's not a situation you'd find yourself in. Right? Right? RIGHT? Whew. You, in the back, answer faster next time, I was getting worried.

Note: this is a somewhat wacky theory on a silly blog, do not mistake this for penetrating analysis from an expert. I just thought it up right now out of thin air.

At the other end of the spectrum is the possibility is that he is an outrageous sex offender who charmed the jury and got away with it, this time. If true we should not be too concerned about the verdict because of the high recidivism rate of sex offenders, that is, watch this space for the next incident or trial. (Well, we should be concerned for the child/children involved, but at this point our legal system has determined that there is no evidence that there was a victim in the first place.)

However, the more time that passes without a new, current claim, the more likely it is that this jury got it right.

In the mean time, I don't think there are too many parents out there who don't have fair warning about overnight visits at MJ's house. O.K. there might be a few uninformed Amish families, but I think even they read the paper sometimes or overhear gossip when in town. And their teens get a year out here before deciding whether to live the Amish life, so even they have some kind of pipeline.

And after all this publicity, any parent foolish enough to let their child stay overnight, might, after filing a claim, face a charge or reckless child endangerment themselves.

How will this affect Michael Jackson's ability to perform and sell albums?

Hard to say. Depends on how many in the public have predecided and how many have been waiting for a jury verdict. The more of the latter, the better his chances. On his side, there was no glove (HA!) that nearly fit him found at the crime scene, and there was much more reasonable doubt, and while terrible, there is a difference between what O.J. was accused of doing and what M.J. was accused of doing.

Also, M.J. is a heck of a lot more talented. How this whole thing has impacted his desire and confidence about facing a crowd is another story. If you grant that he is innocent, that the jury got it right, then imagine the ordeal he has been through, most of the world standing back in horror, many assuming he did it and making nasty jokes, and only a very loyal few standing by his side, during the worst kind of ordeal.

I'm sure some would really dislike this comparison, but very few know what it is like to suffer this particular allegation when innocent. Joseph Cardinal Bernardin of Chicago was lucky, his accuser recanted his charges and asked for and received forgiveness. Until that time, nearly everyone in the media and public pretty much wrote him off as guilty, and much of the press were having a feeding frenzy. Perhaps if MJ offered to forgive his accuser it might trigger a recantation as well, because right now, the allegators (I call them that because it looks like their allegations were a croc) are pretty much trapped into initiation a civil suit or risk looking like liars.

We may never know.

What are your thoughts? Is this OJ revisited or did the MJ's jury get it right?

See the Chicago Tribune coverage for fairly complete details of the story.

That's it for this post.


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Thursday, June 09, 2005

My How This Blog Has Grown - Thank You!


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Thank you for being one of the increasing number of people who read my blog. Since I started blogging in February, the number of visitors to this blog has grown from a few visitors a day to as many as a hundred, and now, nearly one in five visitors do so via a bookmark, meaning that they are repeat visitors who have liked the blog enough to bookmark it enough to come back. Gosh you're cool!

Three months ago yesterday I installed a free site meter from Sitemeter.com that shows how many people show up at my blog every day. While I could pay for lots of expensive charts and dodads, I only get the basic free reports, most of which you can see by clicking on my Click Here for Blog Charts Link at the top of the blog.

But they also e-mail me a report which shows the number of visitors and the number of page views those visitors look at per hour. I signed up for the site meter in March, by then an average of 23 readers per day had found my blog. By today, that average had jumped to 71 per day, enough to boost the weekly average from 164 visitors to 496. The first line of each summary, the one marked total, only reflects the total since the site meter comes in, the one on the front page reflects that actual total.

Sitemeter.com Report for the week of March 8, 2005

                      The Peter Files                  

-- Site Summary ---

Total .......................... 220
Average per Day ................. 23
Average Visit Length .......... 5:53
This Week ...................... 164

Page Views

Total .......................... 476
Average per Day ................. 55
Average per Visit .............. 2.4
This Week ...................... 386

--- Visits this Week ---
Hour 3/3 3/4 3/5 3/6 3/7 3/8 3/9 Total
---- ----- ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ -------
1 1 0 3 0 2 0 0 6
2 1 0 2 1 4 2 0 10
3 1 2 3 1 0 1 1 9
4 1 0 2 0 0 0 1 4
5 0 0 0 5 1 2 0 8
6 0 1 1 0 0 0 4 6
7 0 3 0 0 0 0 1 4
8 0 0 0 0 0 0 1 1
9 0 0 1 0 0 0 2 3
10 1 0 0 0 2 2 1 6
11 2 0 0 3 3 0 5 13
12 4 3 0 2 1 0 1 11
13 3 1 2 1 1 0 5 13
14 0 1 0 0 5 0 5 11
15 1 2 1 0 2 2 2 10
16 2 1 0 0 0 0 1 4
17 1 1 1 0 0 0 0 3
18 1 2 1 1 0 0 1 6
19 0 1 0 1 2 0 2 6
20 1 2 2 1 1 3 1 11
21 0 0 0 4 0 0 0 4
22 1 1 0 2 1 0 1 6
23 0 1 0 0 1 0 0 2
24 0 4 0 0 2 0 1 7
------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ -------
21 26 19 22 28 12 36 164

--- Page Views this Week ---
Hour 3/3 3/4 3/5 3/6 3/7 3/8 3/9 Total
---- ----- ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ -------
1 1 0 3 0 3 0 0 7
2 4 0 5 1 11 2 0 23
3 2 5 7 5 0 1 3 23
4 5 0 11 3 0 0 20 39
5 0 0 0 13 2 13 0 28
6 0 2 1 0 0 0 7 10
7 0 8 0 0 0 0 2 10
8 0 0 0 0 0 0 3 3
9 0 0 1 0 0 0 5 6
10 1 0 0 0 2 4 2 9
11 6 0 0 3 5 0 10 24
12 7 4 0 6 2 0 4 23
13 7 3 10 2 4 0 6 32
14 0 1 0 0 24 0 12 37
15 1 3 1 0 9 3 2 19
16 3 1 0 0 0 0 1 5
17 1 1 1 0 0 0 0 3
18 1 2 2 8 0 0 1 14
19 0 2 0 2 4 0 2 10
20 1 3 7 2 1 10 2 26
21 0 0 0 6 0 0 0 6
22 1 1 0 2 3 0 2 9
23 0 2 0 0 1 0 0 3
24 0 8 0 0 3 0 6 17
------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ -------
41 46 49 53 74 33 90 386

Sitemeter.com Report for the week of June 9, 2005

                      The Peter Files                  

-- Site Summary ---

Total ........................ 4,489
Average per Day ................. 71
Average Visit Length .......... 2:05
This Week ...................... 496

Page Views

Total ........................ 7,651
Average per Day ................ 118
Average per Visit .............. 1.7
This Week ...................... 827

--- Visits this Week ---
Hour 6/2 6/3 6/4 6/5 6/6 6/7 6/8 Total
---- ----- ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ -------
1 2 1 2 2 3 2 0 12
2 2 0 3 2 3 0 1 11
3 1 3 3 2 1 5 1 16
4 0 2 1 0 1 2 1 7
5 3 1 3 2 1 0 3 13
6 4 2 3 1 4 0 8 22
7 3 0 1 4 2 2 2 14
8 3 0 1 6 5 5 1 21
9 4 2 2 0 6 4 1 19
10 3 1 2 2 4 3 6 21
11 2 5 1 2 4 3 5 22
12 2 4 5 7 6 5 6 35
13 4 6 2 3 4 4 5 28
14 1 2 1 6 4 6 3 23
15 6 5 4 3 5 4 4 31
16 4 1 3 6 10 3 3 30
17 2 4 4 4 2 3 7 26
18 1 4 2 3 10 3 3 26
19 1 4 4 7 8 2 1 27
20 0 0 2 3 4 4 1 14
21 2 5 1 6 6 2 1 23
22 2 3 5 0 4 0 2 16
23 3 1 4 3 5 2 0 18
24 1 4 3 4 4 4 1 21
------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ -------
56 60 62 78 106 68 66 496

--- Page Views this Week ---
Hour 6/2 6/3 6/4 6/5 6/6 6/7 6/8 Total
---- ----- ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ -------
1 4 2 2 3 5 2 0 18
2 8 0 7 2 3 0 1 21
3 6 4 5 7 1 5 1 29
4 0 2 1 5 1 2 1 12
5 10 2 4 4 1 0 17 38
6 16 9 4 1 9 0 20 59
7 20 3 2 4 7 2 5 43
8 3 0 1 10 9 9 1 33
9 6 2 3 0 20 6 1 38
10 4 1 2 2 5 4 7 25
11 4 8 1 3 8 4 9 37
12 8 8 7 7 7 7 14 58
13 4 8 4 4 6 5 7 38
14 1 2 1 16 10 12 8 50
15 8 6 4 4 10 11 5 48
16 4 5 6 12 16 5 4 52
17 2 6 5 6 2 4 8 33
18 2 8 2 5 12 3 4 36
19 2 4 4 11 11 4 2 38
20 0 0 4 3 5 4 1 17
21 3 6 2 7 7 2 1 28
22 5 5 5 0 5 0 2 22
23 3 1 4 3 14 2 0 27
24 1 4 3 4 6 7 2 27
------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ ------ -------
124 96 83 123 180 100 121 827

You may notice that results are scattered across all hours of the day. That could be a result of a lot of night owls, and in some cases it is, but the second free counter that I instakked in late may tells another story. From the last time I mentioned this, The Peter Files is now reaching at least 55 countries. That's what I love about the internet, and Blogspot's "Next Blog" feature. Having a wicked cool cousin going to school in Scotland helps too (Hey Sarah!). But really, I love this about the internet, that it is truly international. So if you are visiting from abroad, please click on the "Mouth off" link and say hello and where you are from! As we say over here, Enquiring minds want to know. Say something about how it is over there too, weather, sports, you name it, like here in Chicago it has been hot, humid and rainy, with thunderstorms this week.

1.United States1,26572.12%
2.United Kingdom854.85%
11.United Arab Emirates120.68%
19.Russian Federation70.40%
24.South Africa50.29%
25.Saudi Arabia40.23%
30.New Zealand30.17%
33.Czech Republic30.17%
40.Puerto Rico20.11%
46.Cote D'Ivoire (Ivory Coast)10.06%
49.Croatia (Hrvatska)10.06%
53.Trinidad and Tobago10.06%

So thanks for dropping by the site. With three full months of blogging under my belt I feel like I am just, slowly, starting to get the hang of this. There are still problems I need to solve. My monitor is wide and so I hear that some posts do not show up well on some monitors, please leave a note if you have a problem reading a certain post that causes you to scroll down through a long blank spot to finish reading the post so that I can finish it. I love the comments I am getting so far and the feeling of support for this blog I am getting overall.

Thanks! Don't forget to bookmark this site and tell your friends about it!!!!


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