- 10. Mick: Did you get satisfaction Daisy-May?
- 9. I guess Britney's off her diet.
- 8. Elvis! It's not safe to jump onto that trampoline from the balcony! I don't care if you want to make your jail-house rock!
- 7. Farm radio: There's a surprise pre-dawn 2-for-1 on overalls at Ethyl's Downstate Big & Tall where "We open, before your rooster crows."
- 6. Liz: Michael! I love your new hideaway farmland play land! Where does this little chute go? The playroom? Michael: No! Wait! It's the laundry!
- 5. (Downstate Radio: The rumors that Hillary Clinton will be driving through town on her way to her next campaign stop are untrue. It is safe to return to your homes.)
- 4. Biker bar near the end of an impromptu road stop on the way to Chicago: Whoa! Somebody stomp on that little pink iguana! It stole my stash!
- 3: (Whispered for a YouTube.com video camera: Going for a new world's record, now, 500 frat-boys, 500 cows. When the gun goes off, tip!
- 2. Alright, who had the garbanzo beans with dinner last night?
And the Number One Line heard during last night's earthquake:
- 1. Shhh! We're filming the surprise early morning wake-up call for the 2009 Season Premier of NBC's The Biggest Loser - Boot Camp. We're here in the secret men's barracks somewhere in downstate Illinois. Guest host Ty Pennington gets out his bull-horn....
Hope you liked them!
Peter, Chief Editor and Spelling Wrecker
The Peter Files Blog of Comedy, Jokes, Satire, Commentary and Videos
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