Songs Updated for Baby Boomers

These hits are being revised with new lyrics to accommodate aging baby boomers.

They include:

Herman's Hermits
Mrs. Brown, You've Got a Lovely Walker

Ringo Starr
I Get By With a Little Help From Depends.

The Bee Gees
How Can You Mend a Broken Hip.

Bobby Darin
Splish, Splash, I Was Havin' a Flash.

Roberta Flack
The First Time Ever I Forgot Your Face..

Johnny Nash
I Can't See Clearly Now.

Paul Simon
Fifty Ways to Lose Your Liver.

The Commodores
Once, Twice, Three Times to the Bathroom.

Marvin Gaye
Heard It Through the Grape Nuts.

Procol Harem
A Whiter Shade of Hair.

Leo Sayer
You Make Me Feel Like Napping.

The Temptations
Papa's Got a Kidney Stone.

Abba
Denture Queen.

Tony Orlando
Knock 3 Times On The Ceiling If You Hear Me Fall.

Helen Reddy
I Am Woman, Hear Me Snore.

Leslie Gore
It's My Procedure, and I'll Cry If I Want To.

And an all time favorite:

Willie Nelson
On the Commode Again.


The above came from Mary Ellen, one of our best regular contributors. Remember, you can be a contributor to, just send a joke in a comment, or in an email to thepeterfilesblog @ gmail.com just take out the spaces around the @ sign to make the address work.

Of course, I could not see something like that, without trying to come up with a few of my own.

Andrew Lloyd Weber
Alzheimer Cat
Memories? What?


Elton John
Benny at the Vet's (Admin.)


Robert Palmer
Doctor, Doctor, Gave me the news, I've got a bad case of Diabetes II.
No cake, not Ice Cream too, I've got a bad case of Diabets II.


I lost my license, Now I Trike it.
Katy Perry

No, No, I don't like your health plan!
No, No, I don't need no prunes nor plain bran!
Avril Lavine

I Woke Up Again This Morning
The Partridge Family

Somewhere, I left my Glasses in the House
Wizard of Oz

Drive Very Slow on the Road
Wizard of Oz

Lost in the Big Box Store
Alice Cooper

The Curse of No Name
I'm sitting in the Doctor's can't remember my name
and the kids want to declare me insane
They want the condo in, where was that now
If I don't think, it's nursing room chow.

Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow,
Ow, ow, ow...

America


It's My Party, I Can Nap if I Want To
You'd zonk out too, if you were old as me.
Leslie Gore (OK, I admit, this one is derivative)


Feeling Moody
Simon & Garfunk

Bad Knees, Food Stamps and Fleas
Cher

That's enough silliness for now.
Happy Thanksgiving!

Peter, Chief Editor and Spelling Wrecker
The Peter Files Blog of Comedy, Jokes, Satire, Commentary and Videos
Http://ThePeterFiles.blogspot.com

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